“the traveler sees what he sees; the tourist sees only what he came to see.”

Last spring, when my parents were coming to France for the first time, I asked my mom what she absolutely wanted to see or do during our few days in Paris. Her answer was simple: she just wanted to be there. She wanted to walk the streets, sit in the cafés, see the Eiffel tower from a bridge or a park, explore a museum. My mom doesn’t get to travel a lot, but she’s clearly a traveler. She wants what you can’t get from a guidebook. She wants to know the feeling, the energy, the pulse of a place. (Huh, so that’s where I get it). 

what is deep travel?

I first read about ‘deep travel’ in an interview with New Yorker staff writer Tony Hiss. He talked about the heightened experience and sense of interconnectedness that can arise when we travel with curiosity and openness. To tap into deep travel, he suggested the following exercise: “Imagine you’re on a treasure hunt, but all you know about the next clue is that it will reveal itself within the next three minutes. Your best hope of finding it before anyone else does is to pay close attention to anything and everything around you for the next two hundred and forty seconds.” The world around you is vividly alive with details, sensations, and questions. what is this place about, what is it made of, what does it mean to be from here? and also what kind of fruit is that?? The first step, of course, is to give yourself that three minutes to just be in a place, taking it all in.

Deep travel is about being curious and open to all of it. Usually that means stepping a little bit off the beaten path (and often, getting a little bit lost), just to see what there is to see. That doesn’t mean you have to skip the guidebook entirely, just leave plenty of space in your itinerary for letting yourself wander. (So that when the barista in Tulum extends an invite, you’ll be free to follow her delicate path through the mangrove to a hidden cenote… for example).

how to practice deep travel

leave space

Let travel be more than a to-do list. As you plan your trip or your day, prioritize the sights or experiences that are most important to you so that there’s space to discover and enjoy a new corner of the world, beyond the hot-spots. When I’m considering an activity, I ask myself why I want to do or see this particular thing (hint: if the only reason is that everybody else has been there, it probably won’t make the cut!). This exercise alone has deepened my appreciation for those experiences I do choose. And even though it has meant saving a few things on the list for next time, I am always grateful for the sense of spaciousness and freedom that comes with unscheduled time.

listen 

No matter how many blogs you read about your destination, there will be a lot more to learn on the ground. Be curious and open to information - from your own senses, and from the people you meet. Sometimes when we travel, especially if there’s a language barrier, we might have an impulse to keep interactions brief and conversation to a minimum. Instead, be open to connection. 

Maybe another traveler perks up at the sound of your accent and wants to share their experience; maybe a local sees your hesitation and wants to offer advice or directions. Just being open to these interactions can crack the door to a whole new world. 

Important caveat: Be open to connection, but don’t force it. Read the room. Last summer in a little town on the French Riviera, I was next to a very busy ice cream counter. The young woman scooping up cones was on tiptoes to hear each customer’s order over the fans, and seemed a little stressed by the rush. When she asked the next person in line for his order, he leaned back and smiled and asked her in English, “Hmm, what do you recommend? You must have a favorite. Or what flavor do people from around here like?” My advice to this man, and to you: Some people love sharing their culture and their hometown, others don’t, or simply don’t have the time. Every local just living their life or barista just doing their work is not your personal tour guide. READ THE ROOM. 

notice

One good way to read the room or learn local customs/norms is to pay attention to how other people move. (As I said to my son on the subway platform in Marseille, “There are a lot of people waiting here. But do you hear how quiet it is when you’re not talking?” 🙃) Pay attention to the way people behave on the sidewalk, the way they greet each other, and yes, the volume at which they speak. Be open to information around you; be on the lookout for signage with directions or rules. It’s a simple way to respect the people around you, without asking for a lot of effort in return.

honor

Noticing and listening and leaving space for connection will deepen your experience of travel. Perhaps more importantly, these practices will help you respect and honor the place you’re visiting, and the people and animals who call it home. Because the places you visit are not a picture book or a living museum or an amusement park (unless you know, you’re at an amusement park) - you are a visitor in someone’s home. 

So yes, if you join us in France this fall, we’ll visit places like the Palace of the Popes in Avignon and the postcard-perfect beaches of the French Riviera. We’ll also stroll the farmers’ market in a hilltop village to pick the produce, bread, and cheese we’ll eat for dinner, and walk along ochre and limestone bluffs overlooking the vineyards of the Luberon. With time in between to sit at a café in the same little village, sipping your cappuccino while you marvel at the locals’ pétanque skills (don’t know the beloved French pastime of pétanque? Oh, you will!). 

When you see a place as more than a checklist of things to see and do, when you tread lightly and see deeply, interconnection becomes obvious, and precious.